Never did I imagine...

...that at 26 years old, I would receive a severance package from my employer! YIKES! Yes, you read that right. I was "terminated" from my job as a pediatric physical therapist ~2 weeks ago. Or as they so kindly liked to word things..."there has been a change in policies resulting in a workforce reduction." Well, whatever. However you look at the story, as of Tuesday 2 weeks ago, I was looking for a job. AGAIN. Didn't I just do this a year ago (even though that time was at my own will??) While I have always thought how great it would be to not work, that is a decision that I want to make for myself when the time is right, not a decision that I ever imagined someone else making for me. The reason for my joblessness? The amazing world of government insurance (Medicaid in this case...please, please, please don't get me started!) was going to implement criteria that would prevent ~90% of our patient population from receiving therapy services in a hospital based, outpatient, pediatric clinic. Craptastic! Not only would ~17 therapists be displaced, but sooo many children would probably fall through the cracks and not receive therapy. Hmmm...

Frantic. Look for a job. Tell the families of all these changes. Try to sleep and "live life" when it has been unexpectedly turned upside down. Stress out. Worry. Wonder. Attempt to accept change. These are the emotions of the week following this CRAZY time.

And then last Tuesday afternoon about 5pm, another meeting was called and we were all informed that after speaking with Medicaid officials and bringing them all of the questions that had come out of their "criteria," they informed us to "resume business as usual," as their "intentions were never to disrupt the flow of therapy services to children."

WHAT?? So I was "fired," but now "re-hired?" Is this a late April Fools? Is the joke on me? And a slew of other questions, followed by more uncertainty, wondering what and when the next change might take place.

I knew that through all of this, there was a greater picture, and possibly even a bigger and better plan for my life. My faith was definitely tested. That was the L-O-N-G-E-S-T week of my life. I'm pretty sure that I went through the motions, without feeling much of anything. I only cried once, when I told Nolan about how I was going to miss working with a) my co-workers who I am blessed to call "friends" and b) thinking about all the precious "babies" I have seen since they were born. I generally internalize my emotions, and I know that I definitely did so that week. I didn't feel "stressed," though I now realize that my body was "stressed." (I slept almost 13 hours + 2, 2-hour naps the Friday after I found out)

And now, 1 week later to the day that I "got my job back," I can honestly say that I am glad that I went through this situation. Is that crazy? Even though everyone says that being a therapist is one of the best and most secure jobs, I learned in a 1-hour meeting how NOTHING is secure. I mean, I've known this all along, but it was proven on that day. Tomorrow is not promised. I saw the true character of people I work with, and saw people really come together. I was reminded how blessed I am to have an education that would allow me to find another job. I was reminded what a blessing my husband is, and that even though he is an extremely logical thinker, his steady ways and objective view points were welcome during my "crisis." He calmly reminded me that in the journey of life, this would only be a "bump" along the way. I prayed fervently that God would reveal His plan to me. And He was faithful, as promised. Patience has never been my strong point, but in this situation, I learned to live with the "unknown." And I learned that it was ok. I don't have to plan my every step, because someone much bigger than myself, is already two steps ahead, planning in my best interest.

So maybe this explains my blogging absence. There was no way I could have gathered my thoughts and written about this situation in the midst of it all. I told some of my closest PT friends, and felt nothing but support and encouragement. Again, a reminder of yet another blessing in my life...awesome friends. 

Emotional roller coaster? YES. Valuable learning and character building experience? Absolutely. Seeing, living and feeling the power of prayers of many people? 7 days straight. Being reminded of who is really in control? Amen.

I've always been a control-freak and a major planner. I tend to unravel a bit when things don't go as planned. I like to blame it on my type-A personality. But I hope that this experience has built my character stronger. It taught me great perspective on life, and I will carry it with me, wherever my life journey takes me.

Being Consistent

Consistent. "Constantly adhering to the same principles, course, form, etc." (Thank you, dictionary.com)

Why is it, that as human beings, we have such a difficult time being consistent? I am primarily speaking for myself, but I feel that there are many others out there who struggle with this same exact principle. I desire to be more consistent with many areas of my life. Prayer. Exercise. Eating right. Being a good friend. Being a good wife. Staying in touch with friends. Keeping my house clean. Leading by example. Working with my dog on his behavior problems (a story for another post). And the list simply goes on, and on, and on.

I am not consistent, because when it all comes down to it, I am lazy and have excuses for anything and everything. I can justify doing and/or not doing something in my mind, and convince myself that whichever I have chosen will be "ok." It's "ok" to eat Chick-Fil-A for lunch (even though I'm trying to get in shape, not just for summer, but FOREVER) even though I now know that my entire caloric intake is in a #1 meal. YIKES. But one won't hurt, right? I mean, while I'm running errands, I'll burn some of those calories, right? Surely I'll look better than 50% of the other women out there. (I hate that I think this way!)

Or what about this? Saying my prayers at night and thanking God for everything He has done, only to realize the next morning that I only got about halfway through and fell asleep?? Sure, I say small prayers during the day, but I would compare them more to the likes of "text messages" than to the "emails" I pray at night. Why am I not more consistent in waking up 15-20 minutes early for quiet time before the day starts, than giving God what is left of me at the end of a long day? Because I am lazy. I don't even want to imagine what life would be like if God only gave me His full attention after He was done saving the rest of the world - YEESH!

So not really a New Year's Resolution, but more like my Lifetime Resolution. I desire to be more consistent. Less lazy. The older I get, the more I recognize God's grace in my everyday life. And I am thankful, and constantly amazed. Thank you, Jesus, for dying on the cross. For me. Lazy, little, me.You have saved me from myself, and I am unworthy.

EVERYONE is having babies...

...and I'm getting gray hair! I mean, given my genetic heritage, my mom went salt & pepper by her senior year of high school, so I shouldn't find this all too surprising. I've randomly seen one or two of these little suckers over the past few years, but I just pull them out with tweezers and move on. I don't really believe that two grow back where you pull out one, but maybe I should start reconsidering, because I feel like within the past 3-4 months these little gray hairs are multiplying like rabbits on my head. Not only are they gray, but they are short and generally stick straight up off my head, courser than my other hair. This is a good thing when I'm combing through my hair with my tweezers ready to put an end to them, bad when I have my hair in a ponytail at work and one of my coworkers says "OMG! You have a gray hair sticking straight off your head!" OH...good times! I wonder how much longer I will be able to avoid the magical powers of hair chemicals...

On another note, life at the Peevy household is resuming "normalcy." Over the past 4 months, Nolan has been studying for his PE exam, working crazy hours, working an hour drive from home (which is not super economical in a truck with gas prices on the steady move upward), AND trying to keep up with the daily chores of "life." He took his exam last Friday, is working normal hours, and is now back at the other plant...and I am so thankful. Mad props to all you women who have husbands that work crazy hours or travel frequently. While you find yourself "adjusting" to being alone, it is much more enjoyable to have your other half around and actually see them while you are both awake!

A few weekends ago I went to Nashville for a bachelorette party for one of my sweet friends from PT school, Beth. It was a super fun weekend, and I really want to go back to Nashville with Nolan. I had so much fun being with the girls again, and it really made me miss having a close circle of girlfriends to be around. I love that even though I haven't seen some of them since my wedding, we were able to pick right back up like we did when we saw each other every day. I love when you find good friends like that! (We definitely missed you, Nikki Biscuit!) :)

I can't believe how fast the 2011 year is going by already! Our calendar is filling up with fun things to do for many months to come, and I love it! I cannot help but stop and think how blessed we are with the life that we live! This weekend will be somewhat "low key," and I'm looking forward to spending time with the hubby doing whatever suits our fancy. I hope everyone else has a fabulous weekend as well!!

My Alphabet

I don't have anything spectacular to blog about, but I am stealing this template from a friend's blog for your viewing pleasure. Hope everyone is having a wonderful week and enjoying this amazing weather...tomorrow is my Friday - WOO HOO!!!

A - Age:  26 (27 in June)

B - Bed Size: Queen...dreaming of a California King

C - Chore you hate: cleaning bathrooms

D - Dog's name: Buddy

E - Essential start your day item: breakfast and birth control :)

F - Favorite color: purple

G - Gold or Silver: silver

H - Height: 5' 4"

I - Instruments you play(ed): clarinet (6-8 grade...I just lost cool points!)

J - Job title: Pediatric Physical Therapist

K - Kid(s): one day :)

L - Living arrangements:  in a house with the hubby and pup

M - Mom's name:  Beverly (or Bev, as I refer to her when talking to my friends)

N - Nicknames:  AP, Peevy, Peevs, Peevster, Peevy-Peev, Baby, Ash

O - Overnight hospital: only with Nolan when his appendix blew up and it was miserable

P - Pet peeve: people who are late

Q - Quote from a movie: not a huge movie watcher, and nothing is coming to mind at the moment

R - Right or left handed: Right

S - Siblings: Nick, 28

T - Time you wake up:  5:45 am

U - Underwear: every day

V - Vegetable you dislike: brussel sprouts...never tried them but they sound yucky!

W - Ways you run late: since this is one of my biggest pet peeves, I try so very hard to not be late or make people wait on me...and if I'm going to be late, I try to give a courtesy call

X - X-rays you've had: teeth, ankle

Y - Yummy food you make: foods I make are debatable on "yummy"

Z - Zoo favorite:  pandas

5 months in pictures

Victoria, me, and Elisabeth at the Clemson v Miami Game (Oct 2010)

Clemson v Miami

One Year Anniversary in Savannah (Nov 2010)

One Year Anniversary in Savannah

Christmas 2010

Christmas 2010

Christmas 2010

January 2011 Snow

Buddy's favorite game

Snow-Buddy

What Mom??

Mr. and Mrs. Kristopher Phillips (3-2011)

Kris and Jessica's Wedding

So as you all know by now, I have done a horrible job of keeping up with my blog over the past few months. Here's our life "highlights" in pictures from fall 2010 to present...there are lots of stories, so hopefully soon I'll get around to those, too. And my blog desperately needs a face lift. If only blogging were my full time job...